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4 Conversations That Generate Clients, Trust and Clarity

4 Conversations That Generate Clients, Trust and Clarity

by | Jul 7, 2025 | Connection

4 Conversations That Lead to More Trust, Clarity, and Clients

4 Client-Generating Conversations That Build Trust and Grow Your Business

Most business owners I know (and I know a lot) over-focus on 1:Many marketing strategies instead of leveraging 1:1 conversations that generate clients, clarity, and trust.

I think this is a huge mistake.

 

These days, with the proliferation of content on social media, reaching people organically and meaningfully through posts has become something of an impossible task.

It makes sense that business owners who prioritise building relationships and having meaningful conversations are much more likely to be getting new clients and business growth opportunities than those shouting into the void on social. Yet still, so few people make it a priority.

Years ago, when I first created my life coaching business and hired my first business coach, he used to say to me: “No client is created outside of a conversation.” And so my weekly homework from our sessions was to have more conversations. As a result, my business grew faster than every other woman on my Life Coaching training program. So much so that several of them hired me to help them grow their coaching businesses.

And it makes sense. If you are a coach or other type of service-based business owner who works with clients 1:1 over a number of months or even years, you don’t get clients from a “Buy Now” button on your website. You sign clients up in a conversation.

But it’s not just sales conversations. There are so many more conversations you could be having that could support your business growth. Here are the four most important conversations I think it’s essential to be having on the regular:

1. Research Conversations

What they are: These are 60-minute conversations with people who fit your ideal client profile. Spend 30 minutes asking research questions that dig into what they’re struggling with and what kind of support they need. Then spend 30 minutes coaching them on those very struggles.

Why they matter:

  • They give you valuable information that helps refine your message, offers, and positioning.
  • You hear the exact language your ideal clients use to describe their challenges and desires.
  • These conversations also make people aware of your focus and any new products you’re developing, without it feeling like you’re marketing.
  • You get to build and deepen relationships with the very people you’re trying to serve.

How to approach them: To ensure you’re speaking with people who might be a good fit for your offers, your invitations to these calls need to be clear and specific.

Come to the research part of the call with curiosity, not an agenda. Prepare questions in advance to gather the most useful insights. Aim for open-ended questions about their challenges, desires, and needs. Keep it under 30 minutes (I find 10 questions or fewer works well) so you have a solid 30 minutes to coach and support them.

This is your chance to shine, provide real value, and demonstrate your expertise. I’ve had clients sign new clients after a single good research call. For more on how to conduct audience research, check out this blog.

2. Gift Sessions

What they are: These are 60-minute, no-strings-attached sessions where you offer people who fit your ideal client profile the opportunity to experience your expertise and receive your support.

Why they matter:

  • Like research calls, gift sessions give you insights into what your right-fit people want and need.
  • They allow you to demonstrate your skills and show what’s possible when working with you.
  • They build trust and provide value to people in your network who may already be close to hiring you.
  • They often lead to clients, referrals, testimonials, or deeper interest, even if the person doesn’t become a client immediately.

How to approach them: Intention is everything. Show up to serve, not to sell. I recommend offering gift sessions selectively through targeted campaigns (similar to research calls).

Make a strong and specific invitation that explains clearly what the call is (and isn’t), and who it’s for. End the session powerfully by setting homework or a next step, and invite the person to circle back to you — so you’re not left wondering how or when to follow up.

3. Connection Conversations

What they are: Casual, human-to-human chats with no agenda beyond genuine connection, or where applicable, an opportunity to explore mutual support and collaboration.

I usually schedule 45 minutes and call these Virtual Coffee Dates. I use them to connect with peers, colleagues, past clients, or engaged audience members (although I’m more likely to offer those last two groups gift sessions).

Why they matter:

  • They help build your network in a genuine and sustainable way.
  • A meaningful conversation is more impactful than a LinkedIn note or business card swap.
  • They can lead to referrals, collaborations, and unexpected opportunities.
  • They help keep my business relational, not transactional — especially helpful as an introvert.

How to approach them: Keep it light, low-pressure, and expectation-free. Going in with a fixed outcome can shift the energy and make the conversation feel off. Lead with curiosity and openness.

I like to enter with something I might offer the other person — a client referral, an interview invite, or other support. This keeps me in service and out of self-serving agenda territory (which can be a relationship killer).

When I stay rooted in generosity, the conversations flow and relationships form. I’m still amazed at what can come from a simple coffee chat.

4. Sales Conversations

What they are: These are direct, honest conversations about potentially working together. Invitation-based and rooted in integrity. I call them Working Together Calls so there’s no ambiguity.

I schedule a full hour for these and start by letting the person know that I’ll be coaching during the call. It’s the best way I know to assess fit.

Why they matter:

  • They help someone make an aligned decision about what’s best for them.
  • These calls are an opportunity to assess energy and compatibility.
  • I share my best business strategies and gauge the response.
  • They help potential clients experience what it’s like to work with me before making a decision.

How to approach them: I make coaching by application only. I never pitch. Instead, I invite people to apply. Once the application is submitted, I offer the call.

During the call, I stay rooted in service and ask myself: If this is the only time I ever get to help this person, what would I share? That mindset keeps me grounded and focused.

I never pressure people to decide on the call or try to “overcome objections.” A core part of my ideal client profile is that they’re a hell yes. If I need to convince someone, it’s not a fit. I usually suggest they sleep on it and tell me when they’ll follow up.

Which Conversation Will You Try?

There you have it: four types of conversations that can grow your business faster than social media ever could. Which are you already doing? Which one do you feel inspired to try?

Leave a comment and let me know. I’d love to hear from you.

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Once a week, in the form of an e-letter, I share the best of what I know about building a business with integrity for conscious business owners.

The intention behind these letters is to be a voice for integrity within your (undoubtedly) cluttered inbox. To be the one email you can count on to contain strategic and soulful advice for building a business without selling your soul.

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Rethinking Your Business Non-Negotiables

Rethinking Your Business Non-Negotiables

by | Jun 11, 2025 | Big picture

Rethinking Your Business Non-Negotiables

Rethinking Your Business Non-Negotiables: Prioritising What Really Sustains You

Have you noticed that there are some things in your business that are considered business non-negotiables? Meaning you’ll show up for them come rain or shine, even when you’d rather be doing anything else.

Client sessions, for example, are one of the things in my business I show up for no matter what. I plan around them, prepare for them, and hold that time sacred. And rightly so—they’re the heart of what I do.

If you’re anything like me, however, there are days when you just feel like hiding under the duvet (I think it’s an introvert thing), and the last thing you want to do is talk to people… yet, even on those days, you can bet I turn up to my client sessions with my game face on, mustering all the energy I’ve got for the person in front of me.

Recently in a mastermind call (I joined a business mastermind group myself in 2025!), the coach said:

What would it take for your content creation to be as much of a non-negotiable as your client sessions?

As someone who has been struggling to stick to my once-a-week newsletter schedule, I haven’t been able to get her question out of my mind.

Why is it that some things feel like non-negotiables in my business and others don’t? Business activities that are just as important as client sessions but feel much easier to put off.

The backend tasks. The outreach. The content creation. The systems maintenance. The inbox. The quiet behind-the-scenes work that doesn’t always feel urgent, but is absolutely essential to long-term sustainability.

I can’t help wondering what would shift if we treated those actions with the same level of commitment as a client session?

If following up with a potential collaborator… or writing your newsletter… or reviewing your finances was something you just did—without the internal back-and-forth?

This isn’t about rigid routines or being in a mode of hustle. It’s about recognising what truly supports our business and honouring that with our time and attention.

The Difference Between Urgent and Essential

Part of the reason these tasks often get deprioritised is that they rarely scream for our attention. There’s no external accountability, no set appointment, no one waiting on the other end of a Zoom link. No one to let down (but ourselves).

But that doesn’t mean they’re not as important.

The most sustainable, easeful businesses are built on the quiet consistency of internal commitments. The weekly newsletter. The regular outreach. The financial tracking—even (especially) when income feels sparse.

These are essential tasks.

I’ve seen first-hand how prioritising working in the business (client sessions and service delivery) at the expense of working on the business (e.g. content and outreach) leads to a slowdown in growth.

In 2024, I got so busy working in the business, delivering sessions and group program calls, that I let priorities like writing my newsletter and keeping in touch with people slide. As the year closed, the number of 1:1 clients I had on my books had dropped to its lowest number in 4 years. I don’t believe this is a coincidence.

Why Client Work Feels So Non-Negotiable

It makes sense that client sessions come first. They’re:

  • Time-bound and scheduled

  • Tied directly to income

  • Connected to your sense of service—you don’t want to let anyone down

But what if your content, your visibility, your outreach were also seen as acts of service? What if they were just as crucial to your ability to show up for your future clients as a session is for the ones you already have?

When we only focus on the urgent and consistently fail to show up for the essential, our business will at best, cease to grow; at worst, slowly die. That might sound dramatic but it’s not.

I remember years ago looking at six-figure business coaches like George Kao and Tad Hargrave and wondering why they worked so hard on marketing when they already had huge audiences and were fully booked. I soon came to realise that they prioritise their marketing so that they stay fully booked.

Making Time to Work On the Business, Not Just In It

If you want to rethink and recommit to your non-negotiables, here’s what I recommend:

1. Identify Your Core Non-Negotiables

Not everything needs to be sacred—but some things do. Choose 2–3 actions that you know you need to be doing on a regular basis to move your business forward. That might look like:

  • One newsletter a week

  • Two personalised outreach messages

  • A Friday CEO check-in on finances

  • Time blocked for creating new products and services (or working on that sales page!)

2. Choose and Commit

Once you’ve identified your non-negotiables, pick one you’d like to focus on for now. As tempting as it is to try and start being consistent with several things all at once, I know from personal experience that this is just setting yourself up to fail.

It’s easier to add in one new non-negotiable and get consistent with that before adding any others.

Once you choose your non-negotiable for now, head to your calendar and block out the time. Make the slot recurring every week if you have to. The key is to protect that time. Don’t book over it. Don’t shrink it to the margins of your day. Give these actions the structure and respect you already give your client work.

3. Build in Accountability

I know how hard it is to stick to our plan when we’re the only one watching. You might think I just make a plan and stick to it when nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, over the past 12 years of working for myself, I’ve had to learn ways to keep myself accountable. My favourite ways are:

  • Announcing my commitment to my audience. For example, telling you right now that I’m recommitting to my weekly newsletter schedule. You heard it here first!

  • Doing regular co-working sessions. At the beginning of this year, realising how much more work I got done inside the monthly Cabin Intensives I attend, I reached out to Cabin host Daniela and asked if she would let me host a second monthly intensive. She said yes, and now I do 2 half-day co-working Cabin Intensives a month. I can’t tell you how much more work I get done.

  • Use your calendar. I’m always surprised by how few people schedule their most important activities. I’m a huge advocate of creating and following an ideal schedule.

  • Tell a business buddy. Just telling one other person what we plan to do and then making the commitment to circle back and update them on how we got on can work wonders for our motivation.

4. Let Go of Perfection

Sometimes the very reason we find it hard to follow through on something is because we’re making more of it than we need to. We’re trying to be perfect, which only stops us from doing anything!

If we’re striving for perfection, it’s likely we’ve attached an outcome to the task at hand. For example, this piece of content has to make people want to hire me. With thoughts like that, it’s no wonder that we buckle under the pressure. So what if you just took the pressure off and went with good enough for now?

Let Your Business Evolve With You

Non-negotiables can change. What worked for you six months ago might not make sense now. As your business shifts, your time, energy, and focus will too. That’s not a failure—it’s just feedback.

So take a moment to ask yourself:

What actions do I know support the long-term health of my business—but haven’t been treated as essential?

Pick one. Just one. And this week, show up for it like you would for a client.

No debate. No rescheduling. Just presence, commitment, and trust that it matters.

Because it does.

Leave a comment and let me know what your non-negotiable is and how you get on. I’d love to hear.

SIGN UP FOR MY SOULFUL STRATEGIES WEEKLY

Once a week, in the form of an e-letter, I share the best of what I know about building a business with integrity for conscious business owners.

The intention behind these letters is to be a voice for integrity within your (undoubtedly) cluttered inbox. To be the one email you can count on to contain strategic and soulful advice for building a business without selling your soul.

If you want to receive the Soulful Strategies Weekly, simply share with me your name and email address below and you’ll start recieving emails right away.

Selling Without Selling: My Approach to Sales Calls

Selling Without Selling: My Approach to Sales Calls

by | Jun 3, 2025 | Selling

Selling Without Selling: My Approach to Sales Calls

Selling Without Selling: My Approach to Sales Calls

I want to share with you a behind-the-scenes look at how I run my “sales calls.”

A colleague of mine shared with a group of fellow business owners about her sales process and said, “I hate sales calls.” In the responses that followed, nobody seemed to question this and talked about everything else she had shared instead. But for me, that’s the only thing I heard.

You see, I love sales calls. Well, if you can call them that. I don’t actually think of the call I have with a prospective client as a sales call at all.

In fact, as I pondered her statement, my first thought was that perhaps she hates them precisely because she sees them as “sales” calls.

I have never described the call I have with someone who is interested in working with me as a sales call. Instead, I call it a Work Together Call, and selling is actually the furthest thing from my mind when I get on those calls.

I’m not sure what my colleague does on her “sales” calls, but my guess is that she’s doing some version of pitching her offer. I don’t pitch. Instead, what I seek to do is serve.

Step 1: The Application Form

Why I use one:

1. I get to collect important information that informs my decision as to whether this person is a good fit or not

2. It sends the message that working together is not a given. It speaks to the fact that I don’t just work with anyone who wants to work with me. I have clarity on who my ideal client is, and I choose only to work with those people.

I’ve learned over the years that working with less-than-ideal clients benefits no one. As the coach, you end up dreading the sessions and fail to perform at your best, and the client also suffers because you are not a fit for them. So what’s left is just a deeply unsatisfactory experience had by all. Not worth the money in my opinion.

Step 2: The Work Together Call

Early on in my coaching career, I realised how sales or “discovery” calls were set up in such a way that it felt like the onus was on the coach to convince the prospective client that working together was a good idea.

I rejected this outright.

For me, more important than getting the sale is determining whether or not we are a fit.

  • Is this someone I actually think I can help?

  • Is this someone I think will do what they need to do for the coaching relationship to work?

  • Is this someone I want to work with long term?

There’s no pitching in this scenario.

Entering Work Together Calls with ascertaining fit as my intention is so different from entering the call with the intention of making the sale.

So if I’m not pitching, what am I doing?

Usually, I’m mentoring. I start the call by saying something along these lines:

“We have around an hour together today and I’ve found that the best way to determine whether or not we’re a fit is to dive right into mentoring you. I’d love to know more about your business and your current struggles and in return, I’ll share my best advice and strategies so you can get a sense of whether or not my approach to business is one that will work for you. There’s also time for you to ask me any questions about how I work if you have them. How does that sound? If there’s anything else you want us to cover on this call, let me know now and we can make sure we save space.”

And that’s what we do. If someone were to listen in to one of my Work Together Calls, they would be hard-pressed to see the difference between that call and a session with a client.

Typically, around the 50–55 minute mark, if I have made the decision that this person is a fit (which thankfully most people who apply are), I’ll say something like:

“I’m just noticing the time and I want to share that I would love to work with you. How are you feeling?”

And usually follow up with:

“There’s no need to make a decision today but I’d just love to check in at this point to see where you are at.”

Most people are already a yes, and I actually have to encourage them to sleep on it. I’m a big believer in slowing down the sale because putting the person and their best interests before the sale is a key principle of what I call conscious business.

Why I Don’t Need to Sell on Calls: My Content Does the Heavy Lifting

Most people who get to the point of applying to work with me have already read a fair amount of my content. And because I write content with the goal of serving people rather than selling to people, they already have a really good sense of how I work. They know my approach and my point of view and, as such, have a good idea of what they will get if they work with me.

At the end of Work Together Calls, when I ask how they’re feeling about working with me, it’s not uncommon to hear:

“I was already a yes to working together before we got on the call.”

It’s not my sales page that sells my offers. It’s not the sales call that sells my offers. It’s more often than not, my content. Time and time again, I see this to be true.

A Final Note

I hope this insight into my process has been helpful and, if you have been dreading or avoiding sales calls, that this offers you a more aligned way.

It’s also worth noting that I use the application + Work Together Call process now, but when I was still building my business and had far fewer clients, I would offer a gift session + a Work Together Call, which you can read more about here.

In fact, if this is something you’re working on actively, you might also be interested in a class I taught called Designing Your People-First Sales Process, which you can watch below.

 

If you have any questions about what I’ve shared here, leave a comment below. I’d love to hear from you.

SIGN UP FOR MY SOULFUL STRATEGIES WEEKLY

Once a week, in the form of an e-letter, I share the best of what I know about building a business with integrity for conscious business owners.

The intention behind these letters is to be a voice for integrity within your (undoubtedly) cluttered inbox. To be the one email you can count on to contain strategic and soulful advice for building a business without selling your soul.

If you want to receive the Soulful Strategies Weekly, simply share with me your name and email address below and you’ll start recieving emails right away.

Two Business Mindset Shifts That Changed My Year

Two Business Mindset Shifts That Changed My Year

by | May 28, 2025 | Business Growth, Mindset

Example of quick birthday sale email that brought in 1000 euros

Two Business Mindset Shifts That Changed Everything for Me

I want to share with you two big business mindset shifts that happened for me recently in the hope that it might spark a shift in perspective for you.

I learned many years ago—albeit quite late in life—that sometimes, when we are stuck in struggle, all that is needed to change EVERYTHING is a shift in perspective.

Why Perspective Matters in Business

A really simple example I always use to illustrate perspective is that two people can look out of a window and see heavy rain and one person can feel miserable about it and another person can feel happy about it (I’m the latter!). When we see this, we know then that rain, in and of itself, is neither a good nor a bad thing. What matters is our view of it. Our perspective.

What’s exciting is that when we change our perspective, it changes how we feel. And when we change how we feel, it changes what we do and how we show up.

We so often cling to supposed truths and deeply entrenched beliefs for dear life, even when doing so isn’t serving us. When we can see things differently, everything feels different—and when that happens, it can be a total game-changer for how we show up.

This is why, when I work with clients and they are struggling with something, I go straight to perspective and I ask:

Is the way you are looking at this causing you to feel some sort of way about it?

Mindset Shift #1: From Selling to List Building 

Allow me to share two shifts in perspective I’ve had recently that have changed my entire outlook on my year ahead.

At the end of last year, I wrote my business plan. I did so with a very specific financial target in mind. My plan was centred on how many clients and group/workshop participants I needed to get over the year to hit my goal. Which makes sense on one level—but I realised recently how short-sighted I was being.

My business model centres on four key offerings: 1:1 Coaching, my yearlong group mastermind, smaller group programs (which I only introduced last year), and workshops. My group mastermind and 1:1 are quite steady in terms of numbers, and once the mastermind starts, I know what my monthly income will be from that for the rest of the year. So if I want to increase income (or so I was telling myself), then my only option was to run more workshops and group programs and get more people into them.

Part of my plan for this month was to launch a new workshop, and a week or so ago I took several steps toward making it happen (dragging my feet along the way). I mentioned it in a newsletter to gauge interest (something that usually motivates me to move forward with the plan), I wrote an outline for the workshop, created a promo graphic, and I even worked on the sales page with my favourite copywriter.

As I considered the content, I figured it would require at least 2 x 90-minute teaching calls and probably a 60-minute Q&A call. I usually charge €50 for these, even though I acknowledged to myself some time ago that this price was too low for four hours of workshop time.

Then last week, when it came time to actually launch it, I just couldn’t do it. I actually said out loud at my desk: “I don’t want to do it!” The level of resistance I felt was huge. So much so that I abandoned the task of launching and decided that I would either abandon the idea altogether or simply do one 90-minute workshop for that price point at a later date. I immediately felt better.

You see, here’s the thing: I typically get, at best, around 20 paying people per workshop I run, and give away— to my clients and mastermind participants—another 35 free spots. Twenty people at €50 is €1,000. And as I considered all of the time it would take me to launch and market the workshop, design the workshop content, and deliver the workshop, €1,000 just wasn’t enough to motivate me to do it. And that was if I made €1,000. Given it was quite a techy topic, the chances are that fewer than 20 people would sign up. Meaning I might make €500–800 for all that work!

I had got so caught up in my thinking that I couldn’t see the wood for the trees. Thoughts like “it won’t be useful if it’s not got tons of teaching AND space for Q&A” and “if I charge more than €50, people won’t sign up.” So there I was, stuck with a set of beliefs that weren’t serving me and that were making me want to do anything BUT launch this damn workshop.

Realising all of this, I came to the conclusion that I would either postpone the workshop indefinitely OR I would run it as a single 90-minute session for €50.

From the space that had now been created inside me, the first shift happened. First of all, I could breathe again and felt light and joyful. Then, later that same day, I had a mastermind call (I joined a mastermind myself this year to support me in getting my business to the next level).

The topic of the mastermind call was audience and list growth, which is one of my strategic priorities for the year. I was excited to dive in and it didn’t disappoint—the coach who hosts the mastermind shared her best ideas for list growth, as did everyone else on the call. My mind was ablaze with ideas and then it hit me.

I realised that I had created a business plan so focused on selling this year to hit my financial goal that I wasn’t going to have time to take action on actually growing my list. That’s when I had my epiphany:

What if, instead of hustling to get people into my workshops and programs, I focused on list growth instead?

It was one of those moments where everything shifted—my whole plan for the year and, most importantly, my feelings about my plan! Whereas before I felt a certain sense of dread about marketing and launching so many things, I suddenly felt excited about all the amazing free things I could offer for people to find me and get to know me better—knowing that with a bigger list, it would be easier to fill my workshops next year! It seems so obvious now but I just couldn’t see it before.

With this shift in perspective, I felt so much lighter, so much more creative. Content ideas started flowing again and I felt excited about my work again.

Mindset Shift #2: From Heavy Launching to Light Selling

A few days later, it was my birthday (this is where shift #2 kicks in!). I had planned to head into the city with a friend to go shopping for new yoga clothes and have a nice lunch. My friend was due to pick me up at 9:30 a.m., and so once I awoke, I needed to get ready for the day ahead and get my boys up, fed, dressed, and off to school. It was going to be a busy morning—and then I had a thought!

Oh, it’s my birthday—what if I host a birthday sale for my subscribers?

Part of me thought it would be impossible to get it set up before my friend arrived, but I wanted to try! I had done sales before, so I had emails I could use and the infrastructure already set up. In 20 minutes, and with five minutes to spare before my friend arrived, I had sent the sale email!

Over the course of my birthday and the next day, sales of my workshop replays and bookings of gift and discounted coaching sessions came in. I couldn’t help but laugh as I thought about how heavy I had felt just a few days prior about how much work I was going to have to do to launch my workshop.

In the end, I made just under €1,000 on the sale. I couldn’t believe it—€1,000 for 20 minutes of work versus what I might have made (or probably less) for a workshop that would have taken me about 30 hours to launch, create, and deliver. I have no doubt that my first shift is what gave me the idea and the energy to execute the sale.

Questions to Spark Your Own Shift

These two shifts have changed everything for me, and since having them, I’m having so many ideas about other things I could change in my business to make my life and work more easy.

Now I know it’s not always easy to create a shift in perspective, but I’ll leave you with a few questions that might spark some inspiration when you are feeling in struggle:

What about this could I do differently?

How could this be easier?

What if I ripped up the plan and did something else entirely?

What ideas or beliefs about myself or my business am I holding onto that aren’t serving me?

Let’s Talk

If you have any questions about what I’ve shared here, don’t hesitate to let me know in the comments.

SIGN UP FOR MY SOULFUL STRATEGIES WEEKLY

Once a week, in the form of an e-letter, I share the best of what I know about building a business with integrity for conscious business owners.

The intention behind these letters is to be a voice for integrity within your (undoubtedly) cluttered inbox. To be the one email you can count on to contain strategic and soulful advice for building a business without selling your soul.

If you want to receive the Soulful Strategies Weekly, simply share with me your name and email address below and you’ll start recieving emails right away.

Three Things I Do When In A Time Crunch

Three Things I Do When In A Time Crunch

by | Feb 11, 2025 | Mindset, Uncategorized

 “You can’t calm the storm, so stop trying. What you can do is calm yourself. The storm will pass.”
~ Timber Hawkeye

 

I want to share with you three things I do when I have more things to do than time available to do them in.

I know that in crunch times, it’s all too easy to fall into a state of overwhelm but I learned long ago that overwhelm is a choice and so staying out of overwhelm is also, therefore, a choice. Here’s what I do instead.

 

I reject overwhelm

I’ve written about overwhelm as it effects business owners several times over the years and I always talk about my belief that overwhelm is a choice.

If you think about it, it makes sense. If it weren’t a choice, how is it that some people can feel overwhelmed having far less to do than other people who don’t feel overwhelmed with far more to do.

It’s a bit like rain, one person can look out of the window see rain and feel down, whilst another person (me!) can look out of the window, see rain and feel uplifted. It all depends on how we think about rain (or overwhelm!) I learned many years ago that if I succumb to feelings of overwhelm, they paralyzed me and make it certain that I will in fact get far less done than if I choose to think about things differently.

So rather than collapse into thoughts of “this is impossible, I’ll never get everything done!!” instead, I get strategic and practical and I breakdown my list into priorities and start to take focused and sustained action.

 

I manage my energy

When feelings of overwhelm and stress are circling, I know that the easy route is to try and bury those feelings in food, netflix and doom scrolling. Believe me when I tell you that I am in no way perfect and have taken the easy route more times than I care to mention. It’s precisely because I’ve been down that road and know where it takes me, that when push really comes to shove I know that I need to do everything I can to protect my mindset and my energy. Something neither of those easy options do.

So instead of checking my phone first thing in the morning, listening to the news while I make breakfast, and then rushing around trying to do a million things (all while feeling heartbroken at the state of the world), I actually seriously slow the f*ck down.

The busier I am the more likely it is that I’ll take the time to write in my gratitude journal first thing, then when I get to my office, I’ll burn some incense, savour my cup of coffee and listen to calming music, usually from either Satnam Kaur or Beautiful Chorus before I even think about work.

The impact this has on my ability to stay calm, centered and focused is huge. Only then will I allow myself to tackle my workload.

 

I bend time

Years ago when working with my first Business Coach, I was working on a email course for my audience and in a session, when my coach asked me why I hadn’t done all of my homework, I complained that the lessons for my email course were taking forever to create. I was at that point taking nearly a whole week to create each lesson’s email.

My coach, who was fond of giving me meaty challenges, invited me to create the next week’s lesson in just 90 minutes. As you might imagine, I laughed in response. “not possible” I argued but he persisted. He told me to put aside 90 minutes the following day and use my phone to set a timer, the goal was to complete the email lesson before the 90 minute timer went off. I agreed to try but I couldn’t help feeling like he was setting me up to fail.

The next morning, I did as he told me and something miraculous happened. I did it. I finished the lesson in 90 minutes. I was amazed, it felt like magic and I haven’t looked back since.

I later learned that this is a tool called time-blocking and I’ve been a convert ever since.

My time-blocking game has advanced over the decade since that first experience with it and I now follow the 52/17 rule.

This means using a timer, I spend 52 minutes working on a specific task followed by a 17 minute break.

When I am working I am 100% focused on the task at hand and if I feel tempted to do something else, like check my email or scroll on social media, I only need to look up at my timer and know that soon I’ll have a 17 minute break in which I can do anything I want.

When I’m lucky enough to get a whole day to work on things I’ll plan out my whole day like this using a time calculator. It’s a full day but with plenty of breaks.

And there you have it, 3 things I do to stop me falling apart when I have more work than I can possibly handle! Is there anything you would add to this list? Or anything on this list you would love to try, hot reply and let me know.

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